Thought 01APR2008

THE BIGGER THE BETTER
Karen and I were the proud "Parents of the Day" at our son Michael's kindergarten class. We had fun as he toured us around his classroom and introduced us to all his friends. We joined in for cut and paste and sewing and spent the better part of the morning in the sandbox. It was a riot! "Circle up!" called the teacher, "It's story time." Not wanting to look out of place, Karen and I "circled up" with the rest of our new buddies. After finishing the story, entitled Big, the teacher asked this enthusiastic group, "What makes you feel big?"

"Bugs make me feel big," yelled one young student, "Ants," hollered another. "Mosquitoes," called out one more. The teacher, trying to bring some order back to the class started calling on children with their hands up. Pointing to one little girl, the teacher said, "Yes, dear, what makes you feel big?" "My mommy," was the reply. "How does your mommy make you feel big?" quizzed the teacher. "That's easy," said the child. "When she hugs me and says I love you, Jessica!" - Barry Spilchuk
Don't be afraid to cry. It will free your mind of sorrowful thoughts - Hopi (Native American)

Thought 31MAR2008

GET IN THE WHEELBARROW
The story is told about the famed Zumbrati who walked a tightrope across Niagara Falls. Conditions were less than ideal. It was a windy day and the performer was thankful to have made it safely across. One of those waiting to congratulate him was a man with a wheelbarrow. "I believe that you could walk across pushing this wheelbarrow," the man told him. Zumbrati shook his head and said he felt fortunate to have accomplished the feat without a wheelbarrow.

The man urged him to try. "I believe that you can do it," he said. The aerialist graciously declined but the man kept after him. Finally, the performer said, "You really do believe in me, don't you?" "Oh I do," the man assured him. "Okay," Zumbrati replied. "Get into the wheelbarrow."

So if you really believe ... get in the wheelbarrow. Cast off the concerns, doubts, fears and self-imposed limitations because once you believe something is true, whether or not it is, you will then act as if it is.
Extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II', Glen Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994
A danger foreseen is half-avoided - Cheyenne (Native American)

Thought 28MAR2008

CHANGE
Employees typically respond to work changes by blocking their growth. This resistance tends to be born out of a fear of the unknown. As a manager, your role is not only to be a scout, but also to be a guide. Reduce your employee's fear of the unfamiliar and encourage their acceptance of change by anticipating their reactions and gaining their cooperation :
1) Implement the changes slowly
2) Give staff members adequate lead time as well as time to assimilate the changes.
3) Provide reassurance.
4) Plan the changes with your employees and reward the results of their new actions.
Extracted from 'Bits & Pieces', The Economic Press, Inc., Fairfield New Jersey - From the Library of Puan Hajjah Zaihani Abdul Hamid
Everyone who is successful must have dreamed of something - Maricopa (Native American)

Thought 27MAR2008

THE GIVING TREES
I was a single parent of four small children, working at a minimum-wage job. Money was always tight, but we had a roof over our heads, food on the table, clothes on our backs and, if not a lot, always enough. My kids told me that in those days they didn't know we were poor. They just thought Mom was cheap. I've always been glad about that. It was Christmas time and although there wasn't money for a lot of gifts, we planned to celebrate with church and family, parties and friends, drives downtown to see the Christmas lights, special dinners and by decorating our home. But the big excitement for the kids was the fun of Christmas shopping at the mall. They talked and planned for weeks ahead of time, asking each other and their grandparents what they wanted for Christmas. I dreaded it. I had saved $120 for presents to be shared by all five of us.

The big day arrived and we started out early. I gave each of the four kids a twenty dollar bill and reminded them to look for gifts about four dollars each. Then everyone scattered. We had two hours to shop; then we would meet back at the "Santa's workshop" display. Back in the car driving home, everyone was in high Christmas spirits, laughing and teasing each other with hints and clues about what they had bought. My younger daughter, Ginger, who was about eight years old, was unusually quite. I noted she had only one small, flat bag with her after her shopping spree. I could see enough through the plastic bag to tell that she had bought candy bars - fifty-cent candy bars! I was so angry. What did you do with that twenty dollars bill I gave you? I wanted to yell at her, but I didn't say anything until we got home. I called her into my bedroom and closed the door, ready to be angry again when I asked her what she had done with the money. This is what she told me :

"I was looking around, thinking of what to buy and I stopped to read little cards on one of the Salvation Army's 'Giving Trees.' One of the cards was for a little girl, four years old and all she wanted for Christmas was a doll with clothes and a hairbrush. So I took the card off the tree and bought the doll and the hairbrush for her and took it to the Salvation Army booth. I only had enough money left to buy candy bars for us," Ginger continued. "But we have so much and she doesn't have anything."

I never felt so rich as I did that day.
Kathleen Dixon - extracted from 'a 5th portion of Chicken Soup for the Soul', Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, Health Communications, Inc., 1998
Seek wisdom, not knowledge. Knowledge is of the past, Wisdom is of the future - Lumbee (Native American)

Thought 26MAR2008

EXPERIENCING HAPPINESS
To experience happiness, we must train ourselves to live in this moment, to savour it for what it is, not running ahead in anticipation of some future date nor lagging behind in the paralysis of the past.
Luci Swindoll - extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II, Glen Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994
A brave man dies but once, a coward many times - Iowa (Native American)

Thought 25MAR2008

THE POWER OF DETERMINATION
What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it.
Alexander Graham Bell - Extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II', Glen Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994.
Ask questions from you heart and you will be answered from the heart - Omaha (Native American)

Thought 24MAR2008

On Colonel Sanders
Colonel Sanders had the construction of a new road put him out of business in 1967. He went to over 1,000 places trying to sell his chicken recipe before he found a buyer in his 11 herbs and spices. Seven years later, at the age of 75, Colonel Sanders sold his fried chicken company for a finger-lickin' $15 million!

On Katharine Hepburn
Four-time Academy-Award-winning actress Katherine Hepburn was fired from several of her early stage roles. She was criticized for talking too fast, was considered ornery and difficult to work with and was evaluated as too bony, thin and mannish to be on stage. Accompanied by her unwavering determination, she sought the assistance of a voice and drama coach who nurtured her through a variety of stage roles. Eventually, one of her performances drew great reviews and led to a movie contract.
extracted from a 4th course of Chicken Soup for the Soul, Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Hanoch McCarty and Meladee McCarty, Health Communications, Inc.,1997.
It is easy to be brave from a distance - Omaha (Native American)

Thought 21MAR2008

THE MISS OF A GREAT "MISS"
I'll never forget the day I first saw "a dream walking." Her name was Susie Summers (name changed to protect the fantastic). Her smile, which sparkled beneath two twinkling eyes, was electric and made people who received it (especially guy people) feel very special. While her physical beauty was astounding, it was her invisible beauty I shall always remember. She really cared about other people and was an extremely talented listener. Her sense of humour could brighten your entire day and her wise words were always exactly what you needed to hear. She was not only admired but also genuinely respected by members of both sexes. With everything in the world to be conceited about, she was extremely humble.

Needless to say, she was every guy's dream. Especially mine. I got to walk her to class once a day and once I even got to eat lunch with her all by myself. I felt on the top of the world. I would think, "If only I could have a girlfriend like Susie Summers, I'd never even look at another female." But I figured that someone this outstanding was probably dating someone far better than myself. Even though I was president of the student body, I just knew I didn't stand a ghost of a chance. So at graduation, I said farewell to my first big crush. A year later, I met her best friend in a shopping centre and we had lunch together. With a lump in my throat, I asked how Susie was.

"Well she got over you," was the reply. "What are you talking about?" I asked. "You were really cruel to her the way you led her on, always walking her to class and making her think you were interested. Do you remember the time you had lunch with her? Well, she stayed by the phone the entire week-end. She was sure you were going to call and ask her out." I was so afraid of rejection, I never risked letting her know how I felt. Suppose I had asked her out and she'd said no? What's the worst thing that could have happened? I wouldn't have had a date with her. Well, guess what? I DIDN'T HAVE A DATE WITH HER ANYHOW! What makes it worse is that I probably could have.
Jack Schlatter - extracted from 'Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul', Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen and Kimberly Kirberger, Health Communications, Inc., 1997
If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself - Minquass (Native American)

Thought 19MAR2008

SOMEDAY
How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these.
George Washington Carver
The most desirable woman is always the one who belongs to someone else - Mexican Proverb

Thought 18MAR2008

ANOTHER EXAMPLE
As a leader or a manager in your organization, you must start to behave in a manner that is congruent with the bahaviour you expect from your employees. The top managers in any organization must model the bahaviour they desire for the rest of the company.
Karl Albrecht - Service America - Extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II', Glen Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994.
He who lives with hope dies happy - Mexican Proverb

Thought 17MAR2008

THE WISE WOMAN'S STONE
A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream. The next day she met another traveler who was hungry and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone in the wise woman's bag, admired it and asked the wise woman to give it to him. The wise woman did so without hesitation. The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the jewel was worth enough to give him security for the rest of his life. But a few days later he came back, searching for the wise woman. When he found her, he returned the stone and said, "I have been thinking. I know how valuable this stone is, but I give it back to you in the hope that you can give me something much more precious. If you can give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me the stone."
The Best of Bits & Pieces - extracted from 'Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul', Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Jennifer Read Hawthorne and Marci Shimoff, Health Communications, Inc; 1996.
Do not wrong or hate your neighbour for it is not he that you wrong but yourself - Pima (Native American)

Thought 14MAR2008

AFTER A WHILE
After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security,
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open,
with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child,
And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can ensure ...
That you really are strong,
And you really do have worth.
Veronica A Shoffstall - extracted from 'A 2nd helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul' Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, Health Communication, Inc., 1995
A smile will gain you ten more years of life - Chinese Proverb

Thought 13MAR2008

NO RECALL NEEDED
A newspaper reporter once asked Sam Rayburn, "Mr Speaker, you see probably a hundred people a day. You tell each one 'Yes' or 'No' or 'Maybe.' You are never seen taking notes on what you told them, but I have never heard of you forgetting anything you have promised them. What is your secret?"

Rayburn carefully eyed his questioner and replied, "If you tell the truth the first time," he replied, "you don't have to remember."
Extracted from 'Speakers Sourcebook II', Glenn Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994
Dance as if no one's watching, sing as if no one's listening, and live everyday as if it were your last - Irish Proverb

Thought 12MAR2008

WHEN YOU BELIEVE
There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frailIt's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe
Mariah Carey & Whitney Houston - from soundtrack of Prince Of Egypt
In youth we learn, in old age we understand - Mexican Proverb

Thought 11MAR2008

I'LL DO IT MYSELF
What do you do if you've invested sixteen years of your life with a company and your ideas for change are disregarded? Ask Liz Claiborne. Claiborne was a clothing designer with the Jonathan Logan Company. She believed their limited variety of patterns and sizes were insufficient to meet the changing needs of their market. Efforts to convince management that body types and style preferences warranted innovation in design fell on deaf ears.

Undiscouraged, Claiborne became a vehicle for stylish and affordable women's apparel by starting her own company. Her versatile designs appealed to the growing number of women in the workforce and to store buyers. Liz Claiborne, Inc. experienced enviable growth throughout the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s, ultimately attaining the number-one position in the woman's fashion industry.

Proactive change agents act upon the convictions of their beliefs regardless of the resistance presented by outside forces.
Extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II', Glen Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994
When the game is over, the king and the pawn go into the same box - Italian Proverb

Thought 10MAR2008

ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL DAY
It's pleasant to daydream. We yearn for perfect subordinates, for the ideal company or organization, for flawless action within ourselves. What a great world that would be! Yet - would it? A life without struggle, without imperfection, would pall on us faster than we can imagine. We'd be like the fellow from the Maine woods who made his first trip to Arizona. At first he was delighted with the sunny, mild weather, but a after few weeks of cloudless skies he looked out of the window one morning and muttered, "Oh, no! Not another beautiful day!"
Extracted from Bits & Pieces, The Economics Press, Inc., Fairfield, New Jersey, USA - From the Library of Puan Hajah Zaihani Abdul Hamid
Money is a good servant, but an evil master - Mexican Proverb

Thought 09MAR2008

ON MISTAKES
We teach people that mistakes are like skinned knees for little children. They're painful, but they heal quickly and they're learning experiences. My people are covered with the scars of their mistakes. They lived out in the field; they've been shot at; they've been hit in every part of their bodies; and they're real. By the time they get to the top, their noses are pretty well broken. The chances of their getting there with a clean nose are zero.
H Ross Perot - Extracted from 'Speaker's Sourcebook II', Glenn Van Ekeren, Prentice Hall, 1994
Call a child a bad name and he will live up to it - Chinese Proverb

Thought 06MAR2008

THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING ME WELL
As a young social worker in a New York City psychiatric clinic, I was asked to see Roz, a 20-year-old woman who had been referred to us from another psychiatric facility. It was an unusual referral in that no information was received ahead of her first appointment. I was told to "play it by ear," and to figure out what her problems were and what she needed. Without a diagnosis to go on, I saw Roz as an unhappy, misunderstood young woman who hadn't been listened to in her earlier therapy. Her family situation was unpleasant. I didn't see her as a disturbed, but rather as lonely and misunderstood. She responded so positively to being heard. I worked with her to start a life worth living - to find a job, a satisfying place to live and new relationships. We hit it off well and she started making important changes in her life right away.

The records from the previous psychiatric facility arrived a month after Roz and I began our successful work together. To my complete surprise, her records were several inches thick, describing a number of psychiatric hospitalizations. Her diagnosis was "paranoid schizophrenic," with a comment on her being "hopeless." That had not been my experience with Roz at all. I decided to forget those pieces of paper. I never treated her as if he had that "hopeless" diagnosis. (It was a lesson for me in questioning the value and certainty of diagnoses). I did find out about the horrors for Roz of those hospitalizations, of being drugged, isolated and abused. I also learned a lot from her about surviving such traumatic circumstances.

First Roz found a job, then a place to live away from her difficult family. After several months of working together, she introduced me to her husband-to-be, a successful businessman who adored her. When we completed our therapy, Roz gave me the gift of a silver bookmark and a note that said, "Thank you for believing me well." I have carried that note with me and I will for the rest of my life, to remind me of the stand I take for people, thanks to one brave woman's triumph over a "hopeless" diagnosis.
Judy Tatelbaum - extracted from 'Chicken Soup for the Soul at Work' by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Maida Rogerson, Martin Rutte & Tim Clauss, Health Communications, Inc., 1996
It's better to be poor, than to live alone - Mexican Proverb

Thought 05MAR2008

DIFFICULT EMPLOYEE?
Got a difficult employee on board? It may seem that there is nothing you can do to successfully assimilate this individual into the office mainstream. So perhaps, you're thinking that the best thing to do would be to avoid this person. However, that is no answer. Dealing with problem employees is often an inescapable part of being a manager. There are constructive ways to handle them.

Stop and think. While your first instinct is to react emotionally rather than rationally, it is far better to slow down and reflect on the employee's behaviour. Dictate your response by what you want to have happen, rather than how you feel about the situation.

Honour the employee. As impossible as it may sound, it is essential to validate the other person. Before discussing your point of view, make it clear that you emphatize and that you are listening.

Ask a crucial question : "What would you like me to do?" The response may enable you to improve the situation and it will force the difficult person to stop reacting and start thinking.

Whatever you do, don't take employee clashes personally. If you do, managing your problem employee may become more difficult that it already is. Instead, focus your efforts on finding out what the employee really wants from you. If you do, a solution will present itself.
Extracted from Bits & Pieces, The Economics Press, Inc., Fairfield, New Jersey, USA - From the Library of Puan Hajah Zaihani Abdul Hamid
The light heart lives long - Irish Proverb

Thought 04MAR2008

THREE THINGS
Three irrevocable things in your life are :
Words ... Time ... and Change
Three undeniable things in your life are :
Serenity ... Honesty ... and Hope
Three gems of your life are :
Love ... Self Esteem ... and True Friends
Source Unknown - framed; in the men's toilet at Chiangmai International Airport
If you are tough you don't live longer, if you are weak don't die faster - Somali Proverb

Thought 03MAR2008

AN ACT OF KINDNESS
President Abraham Lincoln often visited hospitals to talk with wounded soldiers during the Civil War. Once, doctors pointed out a young soldier who was near death and Lincoln went over to his bedside. "Is there anything I can do for you?" asked the President. The soldier obviously didn't recognize Lincoln and with some effort he was able to whisper, "Would you please write a letter to my mother?" A pen and paper were provided and the President carefully began writing down what the young man was able to say:

"My dearest mother, I was badly hurt while doing my duty. I'm afraid I'm not going to recover. Don't grieve too much for me, please. Kiss Mary and John for me. May God bless you and father.

"The soldier was too weak to continue, so Lincoln signed the letter for him and added, "Written for your son by Abraham Lincoln." The young man asked to see the note and was astonished when he discovered who had written it. "Are you really the President?" he asked. "Yes, I am," Lincoln replied quietly. Then he asked if there was anything else he could do. "Would you please hold my hand?" the soldier asked. "It will help to see me through to the end." In the hushed room, the tall gaunt President took the boy's hand in his hand and spoke warm words of encouragement until death came.
The Best of Bits & Pieces - extracted from 'a 3rd serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul', Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, Health Communications, Inc; 1996
Praise the sea, but keep on land - Chinese Proverb